Preface
These
reflections were admittedly written with a vocational discernment perspective.
That is, they were written thinking first of those men, particularly younger
men, who have not yet chosen a permanent state in life. Thus, the details of
married life, or the priesthood, or life relationships are treated rather
generally. The idea was certainly not to write a textbook that would advise all
Catholic men in the practical details of their day to day life. For that, the
author is poorly qualified. Rather, the details contained here focus primarily
on the forgiveness of Jesus Christ, and what every man has in common when he
tries to make a return to the Lord. On this subject, I myself claim some
expertise. In short, I only claim the credentials that I myself stand in need
of a savior, and have come to find out who that Savior is. These reflections
for Catholic men really have no greater point than to give a glimpse of how
great a salvation has been offered to all men, and women, in Jesus Christ our
Lord.
Dedicated to the Blessed Virgin Mary
May 2015
Last summer I joked that I would write a book for our newly
ordained transitional deacon, about what it is like to be a young priest in
Vermont. A number of events since then have turned that jocose idea into this,
a series of reflections about what it is like to live as a devout Catholic man
in our world. If you are a Catholic man, or have the desire to follow Christ,
then these reflections are for you. It doesn’t matter where a man lives, or
what he does in his life; his life is described in Sacred Scripture. Every man
is described in Sacred Scripture, from the worst of sinners to the greatest of
saints. The comparison between the two is really in our minds and thoughts all
the time. Every good man wants to become a better man. Every man who has the
virtue of honesty, or hard work, or responsibility, or chastity, or gratitude,
realizes that he needs that virtue, and needs it as much as possible, because
he sees his own shortcomings. We could even say that the man who has a great
moral fault, but who admits to that fault, already has some of the virtue
needed to overcome it. Otherwise there would be no way of acknowledging that
such a fault had to be overcome in the first place. It is the man who knows he
needs a savior who is close to finding the salvation that the Lord Jesus has to
offer.
Let us start with a man who was both a
sinner and a saint at different times. You know the story of the king of
Israel, David. He was anointed to be king because of his pure heart and his
faithful spirit and strength. He slew the giant Goliath. He suffered unjust
persecution from the corrupted and jealous king Saul. He finally ascended to
the throne and united the Kingdom of Israel. He received the incredible promise
from God that one of his descendants would always and forever sit on the throne
of Israel. And then, after all of this, he committed adultery, and murdered
Bathsheba’s husband to cover up his sin (2 Sam. 11). What was God’s response?
God sent Nathan to tell David a story. The man in the story had to entertain a
friend. The man of the story was rich, with hundreds of sheep, and yet he stole
the one sheep of a poor man to prepare the meal. The man in the story was
condemned by David for his callous crime. And then Nathan proclaimed that the
man in the story was David. Nathan's words could almost be heard re-echoed over
all the sins of men.
2 Samuel 12:1-7. The LORD sent Nathan to David, and when he came
to him, he said: “Judge this case for me! In a certain town there were two men,
one rich, the other poor. The rich man had flocks and herds in great numbers.
But the poor man had nothing at all except one little ewe lamb that he had
bought. He nourished her, and she grew up with him and his children. She shared
the little food he had and drank from his cup and slept in his bosom. She was
like a daughter to him. Now, the rich man received a visitor, but he would not
take from his own flocks and herds to prepare a meal for the wayfarer who had
come to him. Instead he took the poor man’s ewe lamb and made a meal of it for
his visitor.” David grew very angry with that man and said to Nathan: “As the
LORD lives, the man who has done this merits death! He shall restore the ewe
lamb fourfold because he has done this and has had no pity.” Then Nathan said
to David: “You are that man!”
“You are that man.” The words were a
stinging condemnation. Those words could have been used by any of the prophets
of the Old Testament. They could have been written large across the foreheads
of every sinner from Solomon to John the Baptist. And they could have been used
often by the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. “You are that man, that sinner, that
adulterer, that sloth, that embezzler, that pornographer, that murderer!” My
brothers in Christ what a consolation it is that we have a Savior. Of all the
people that could accuse us, we have been accused by the one person who wants
to forgive. Jesus Christ says to us, “you are that man that I shed my blood for.” “You are the man to whom I have
offered complete and total forgiveness.” A new story, a new parable, has been
given. In so many parables Jesus described “a man.” In so many of those
parables, our salvation is found in saying “You are that man.” “I am that man.”
The parable of the prodigal son
Let
us take the words of the Prophet Nathan and consider how they were spoken to us
in the scriptures. Here is a parable even more well known than Nathan's parable
to David.
Luke
15:11-16. A man had two sons, and the younger son said to his father, “Father, give me the share of your estate that should come
to me.” So the father divided the property between them. After a few days, the
younger son collected all his belongings and set off to a distant country where
he squandered his inheritance on a life of dissipation. When he had freely
spent everything, a severe famine struck that country, and he found himself in
dire need. So he hired himself out to one of the local citizens who sent him to
his farm to tend the swine. And he longed to eat his fill of the pods on which
the swine fed, but nobody gave him any.
To describe the prodigal son, let me
borrow a description of St. Francis of Assisi, before his conversion to Christ.
Cardinal Sean O'Malley, himself a Franciscan, once called him “a self-absorbed
entertainment addicted rich kid.” It took Francis quite a while to “grow up.”
Likewise with the prodigal son; what type of man is he? He loves the social
scene and the night life. He can't get enough of a good time. He doesn't see
why anyone should save money. Money is to be spent to enjoy life and “make the
best of it.” If his older brother is right the prodigal wanted money just as
much to be a chick magnet (see Luke 15:30). And so the prodigal demands all his
money, preferring pleasure even over having a father! “Give me MY share of the
inheritance!” This is like saying to the father, “I wish you were already dead,
old man; I don't love you, and I hate this family and this home and this farm;
so just give me the money and get this stupid so-called life over with.” A self-absorbed
entertainment addicted rich kid. You know how his life will unfold in the
parable. Experience in the school of hard knocks will eventually teach him how
good he had it.
What
do you think of the accusation that the older son makes against his prodigal
brother? Is it farfetched to say that much money went into womanizing and sex?
If we think of the prodigal son as a young man is his 20s or 30s, it is hard in
our modern day to think of a similar example without imagining a man indulging
in his fair share of lust. Here we might note a particular word use in the
parable about the infidelity of the prodigal son. When he had used up his money
on prostitutes (according to the accusation of the older brother) the parable
says he “joined himself” to one of the landowners. The words have a romantic
and marital connotation. A man of purity and integrity would only “join
himself” to a holy cause. In particular a married man has exclusively “joined
himself” to his wife and family as his most virtuous endeavor. But this sinful
son had “joined himself” to many women, and even more fleeting causes, and had
subsequently suffered the consequences. The only option left for “joining” was
a swine farmer. Sexual impurity is a slow corrosive on one's fulfillment in life.
It might not bring about immediate disaster. But it is guaranteed to bring
about misery.
Is this
parable merely a condemnation of the more obvious sins of youthful passion? No.
Because the older brother of the prodigal son is also a sinner.
Luke
15:27-29. The servant said to the older
brother, “your younger brother has returned and your father has slaughtered the
fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.” He became angry, and
when he refused to enter the house, his father came out and pleaded with him.
He said to his father in reply, “Look, all these years I served you and not
once did I disobey your orders; yet you never gave me even a young goat to
feast on with my friends.”
He is the ungrateful, self-righteous
type. He is the self-made man who does not need God. His sins are presumption
and ambition. He resents the work his father has given him to do in the family
business. Only, his greed and anger are more subtle than the younger brother's.
He hates his own brother, yet probably envies him slightly at the same time,
wishing to have all of the inheritance. He is the unmerciful and unforgiving
Pharisee whom Jesus spoke of various times.
Remember the
parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector?
Luke
18:10-14. He
then addressed this parable to those who were convinced of their own
righteousness and despised everyone else. “Two people went up to the temple
area to pray; one was a Pharisee and the other was a tax collector. The
Pharisee took up his position and spoke this prayer to himself, ‘O God, I thank
you that I am not like the rest of humanity—greedy, dishonest, adulterous—or
even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week, and I pay tithes on my whole
income.’ But the tax collector stood off at a distance and would not even raise
his eyes to heaven but beat his breast and prayed, ‘O God, be merciful to me a
sinner.’ I tell you, the latter went home justified, not the former; for
everyone who exalts himself will be humbled and the one who humbles himself
will be exalted.”
This is almost the prodigal son all
over again. Which is more of an insult to the Heavenly Father? The profligacy
of the younger son, of the ingratitude and presumption of the older son? All
men are in the same boat when compared to our Lord: sinners.
The
Gospels paint men in just as sinful a picture as any women. When I hear the
stories of the sinful or desperate women that came to Jesus in his ministry, it
occurs to me that these accounts might be used as an accusation that the
Gospels are sexist. “All examples of poor pitiful sinners are women,” someone
might claim, “and men are the righteous ones who don't need to 'get it
together.'” I imagine this accusation; and then I search the scriptures to see
how wrong it is. The truth be told, there are more examples of sinful men in
the Gospels; the prodigal son and his older brother; the wicked vineyard
tenants (Mt 21:33-41); the boys possessed by demons, or deathly ill, subjected
to the devil's power; both Judas and St. Peter (although one repented and
became a saint); the two thieves crucified with Jesus, on his left and on his
right. Mary Magdalene was possessed by seven demons; the Gerasene man was
possessed by a whole legion of demons, not just seven (Mark 5:1-17). The men
who begged Jesus to come work miracles (e.g. the centurion in Luke 17:1-10, the
official in John 4:46-53), they seemed composed and more diplomatic than some
of the women who sought out Jesus (Luke 7:36-50, Mark 7:25-30). Rest assured
any apparent composure of these men who petitioned Jesus for a miracle was a
front. It was out of the mercy of Christ that he granted the miracles, not
because these men had presented themselves more worthily than the women who
made similar petitions. What good is such a front when real courage is needed?
Go to Calvary and compare the number of men brave enough to stand at the scene
of the crucifixion to the number of women. Without furthering this comparison,
we could simply say that the men in the Gospels need to “get it together” just
as much as the women. For our part we can be glad that Jesus' teaching more
often spoke about sinful men than about sinful women. For, as we have said,
Jesus Christ says to us, “you are that man that I shed my blood for.” “You are
the man to whom I have offered complete and total forgiveness.”
The Parable of the Forgiving King
Jesus
told a parable which spoke of the incredible forgiveness that he has offered to
sinners. He did so as a commentary on the prayer which he taught us to say:
“forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Read
the parable in Matthew Chapter 18. You know the punchline.
Matt
18:21-35. Then Peter asked Jesus, “Lord if my
brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times?”
Jesus answered, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times. That is
why the kingdom of heaven may be likened to a king who decided to settle
accounts with his servants. When he began the accounting, a debtor was brought
before him who owed him a huge amount. Since he had
no way of paying it back, his master ordered him to be sold along with his
wife, his children, and all his property, in payment of the debt. At that, the
servant fell down, did him homage, and said, ‘Be patient with me, and I will
pay you back in full.’ Moved with compassion the master of that servant let him
go and forgave him the loan. When that servant had left, he found one of his
fellow servants who owed him a much smaller amount. He seized him and started to choke him, demanding, ‘Pay back what you
owe.’ Falling to his knees, his fellow servant begged him, ‘Be patient with me,
and I will pay you back.’ But he refused. Instead, he had him put in prison
until he paid back the debt. Now when his fellow servants saw what had happened
they were deeply disturbed, and went to their master and reported the whole
affair. His master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave
you your entire debt because you begged me to. Should you not have had pity on
your fellow servant, as I had pity on you?'”
The meaning of the parable is clear.
Jesus is the King. The debt forgiven is our doubt of sin. The full pardon was
offered when he died on the cross. The man who refuses to forgive his neighbor
has thrown that great gift back in the face of the King, thus incurring and even
greater debt of sin. How great is the forgiveness that Jesus offered to men it
the first place? According to Jesus, the first man's debt in the parable, the
“huge amount,” is said to be a “myriad of talents.” A myriad was the greatest
number in the common vocabulary of the Jesus' day: ten thousand. A talent was
the most valuable piece of currency: a whole year's wage in one silver or gold
coin (if you had a good job). Jesus described the biggest kind of debt he could
in common terms. It would be as if we said a man owed millions and billions of
dollars. Is this a realistic comparison for the “debt of sin”?
Here
again we can consider the parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector. It is
an almost comical comparison looking back at the two pictures of repentance;
the two extremes are so unlikely. But this shows the complete tragedy of sin.
We could put it in a modern day analogy. Imagine two men go to confession. The
first says to the priest, “bless me father for I have sinned; I've broken every
commandment, more than you could count. Yes. Put me down for everything in the
book, because I will never have time to list them all!” The second says, “bless
me father... I haven't committed any sins lately and I have pretty much become
a living saint. The Blessed Virgin Mary and I are always on the same page now,
completely in touch with the Holy Spirit. But give me a blessing and I'll pray
for you and for all the other people in line!” It amuses us. It is such a
parody that we could not imagine anyone seriously saying something like either
of these men. And yet our Lord insisted that we think of ourselves much like
the first man. What if we confess “I haven't broken any of the ten
commandments, except I could love God a little more and do better with the
First Commandment...” Is that all? You have them all down except the first? The
first is the biggest and most important. We could almost say “you were just one
Hail Mary away from heaven when you died. No big deal. Hell won't be that bad
for you!” Sin is a tragedy. The incredible thing is that the parable of the
forgiving king does not even qualify as hyperbole in its description of the
weight of sin. It is understatement. A mortal sin committed against the Creator
of the universe incurs a debt greater than we could put into human words. A
myriad of talents, millions and billions of dollars, does not do justice to its
gravity. The beautiful thing, on the other side of the coin, is that the
parable barely describes the immense grace offered by Christ (1 Peter 1:18-19).
His forgiveness is more than enough to make up the debt, for any man who will
accept it. The weight of mortal sin may be understated, but our human words
understate the grace of God even more. Just as it would have been nothing for
the king to forgive even this huge amount, it is nothing for God to rectify the
situation of the sinner. His grace is limitless. It should completely change
the way men go about their lives. They should be so grateful to have a
forgiving Lord. They should make good on a new kind of debt, a debt of
gratitude. With God's grace, the debt of gratitude is in fact repaid easily,
through daily installments of love.
The parable of the talents
The
Lord's forgiveness is not merely a debt being removed from our account. It is
essentially a positive gift to us. In truth, God has not merely wiped out the
debt. He as given us a spiritual currency, something positively precious and
valuable so that the debt can be repaid. He has given us, by his grace, the
means to make a return to him with our faithful loyalty, and our service, which
is an exercise of the greatest divine virtue: love. This is not a sentimental
word. It is a responsibility and a privilege at the same time. It is the
summation of every vocation.
In
order to show the privileges and salvific opportunity that God has given us,
our Lord used to tell another parable about silver or gold talents, entrusted
to ten servants of a king. In Matthew and Luke you will hear different versions
of the story with similar themes. Let us look at Matthew's first. Here Jesus
points out that not all are given the same gifts, but each is given talents to
match the responsibilities laid upon him by the Lord. As a man of God, do not
worry so much about which or how many talents have been given you. Know that
they are given for a reason by a Master who knows you better than you know
yourself. Then, if you want the satisfaction of a job well done, do not think
so much about your abilities, but think about the Master you are serving. Read
the parable and be impressed by such a great Lord:
Matt
25:14-30. The Kingdom of God will be as
when a man who was going on a journey called in his servants and
entrusted his possessions to them. To one he gave five talents; to another,
two; to a third, one; to each according to his ability. Then he went away.
Immediately the one who received five talents went and traded with them, and
made another five. Likewise, the one who received two made another two. But the
man who received one went off and dug a hole in the ground and buried his
master’s money. After a long time the master of those servants came back and
settled accounts with them. The one who had received five talents came forward
bringing the additional five. He said, “Master, you gave me five talents. See,
I have made five more.” His master said to him, “Well done, my good and
faithful servant. Since you were faithful in small matters, I will give you
great responsibilities. Come, share your master’s joy.” Then the one who had received two talents
also came forward and said, “Master, you gave me two talents. See, I have made
two more.” His master said to him, “Well done, my good and faithful servant.
Since you were faithful in small matters, I will give you great
responsibilities. Come, share your master’s joy.” Then the one who had received
the one talent came forward and said, “Master, I knew you were a demanding
person, harvesting where you did not plant and gathering where you did not
scatter; so out of fear I went off and buried your talent in the ground. Here
it is back.” His master said to him in reply, “You wicked, lazy servant! So you
knew that I harvest where I did not plant and gather where I did not scatter?
Should you not then have put my money in the bank so that I could have got it
back with interest on my return? Now then! Take the talent from him and give it
to the one with ten. For to everyone who has, more will be given and he will
grow rich; but from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away.
And throw this useless servant into the darkness outside, where there will be
wailing and grinding of teeth.”
Note the following things. The
parable prioritizes the spiritual greatly above the material. Virtue is more
important than money. This was emphasized by our Lord in many parables. Note
that the master considers large amounts of money to be “small matters.” How so?
As we said, a talent of gold or silver was worth more than the average man's
yearly wage. Say $50,000 to $100,000 in our day, maybe more. Is that not a big
deal? But look again at the master's words to the man who was given five
talents and who returned with a sum equivalent, in our terms, to almost a
million dollars. “You were faithful in small matters.” Small matters! We serve
a Master for whom “big money” is something trivial. It is a mere test, a
preliminary. The saying is true, “you can't take it with you when you go.” The
Lord Jesus told another parable precisely with this point. Remember well the
concluding words.
Luke
12:16-21. Then
he told them a parable. “There was a rich man whose land produced a bountiful
harvest. He asked himself, ‘What shall I do, for I do not have space to store
my harvest?’ And he said, ‘This is what I shall do: I shall tear down my barns
and build larger ones. There I shall store all my grain and other goods and I
shall say to myself, “Now as for you, you have so many good things stored up
for many years, rest, eat, drink, be merry”' But God said to him, “You fool,
this night your life will be demanded of you; and the things you have prepared
to whom will they belong?” Thus will it be for the one who stores up treasure
for himself but is not rich in what matters to God.
What matters to God, the spiritual,
is valued greatly above the material. Knowing this, we see another wonderful
quality of the Lord which we should imitate. Our Lord is demanding without
being greedy. See how the master in the parable of the talents used to send his
men to harvest in fields where they had not even planted any seed. Such a
mission would have been extremely taxing compared to the amount of stray wheat
they might find. Did the master demand this because of a desire to squeeze
every last bit of profit out of his land and his workers? No. We have already
established that he considered the money to be trivial. It was for the good of
the workers, and for the principle of service that he demanded such things. So
a Catholic man should have passion and zeal, but not be greedy. He should be
demanding of himself, and work hard, but unselfishly. He may even task other
people with very difficult service for a holy cause. But not for the money. For
the Lord.
Let
us look now at the way Jesus told the story in the Gospel of Luke. Here all the
men have the same equivalent of one talent, and the difference is in their
attitude and commitment.
Luke
19:13-26. He called ten of his servants and gave
them ten gold coins and told them, “Engage in trade with these until I return.”
When he returned after obtaining the kingship, he had the servants called to
whom he had given the money, to learn what they had gained by trading. The
first came forward and said, “Sir, your gold coin has earned ten additional
ones.” He replied, “Well done, good servant! You have been faithful in this
very small matter take charge of ten cities.” Then the second came and reported,
“Your gold coin, sir, has earned five more.” And to this servant too he said,
“You, take charge of five cities.” Then the other servant came and said, “Sir,
here is your gold coin; I kept it stored away in a handkerchief for I was
afraid of you, because you are a demanding person; you take up what you did not
lay down and you harvest what you did not plant.” He said to him, “With your
own words I shall condemn you,
you wicked servant. You knew I was a demanding person, taking up what I did not
lay down and harvesting what I did not plant; why did you not put my money in a
bank? Then on my return I would have collected it with interest.” And to those
standing by he said, “Take the gold coin from him and give it to the servant
who has ten.” But they said to him, “Sir, he has ten gold coins.” “I tell you,
to everyone who has, more will be given, but from the one who has not, even
what he has will be taken away.”
At least one of the men here succumbs
to the nagging doubt, “I only have this once talent, this one chance; what if I
invest my time and energy and it doesn't work out?” Men face fears in
contemplating big vocational decisions in live. “My girlfriend wants to be
married and have a family, but I'm not prepared for that.” “I think I'm called
to the priesthood, but it's such a big decision.” “There is some major decision
for my work, family, or marriage situation, but I am putting it off because it
is just too much to deal with.” There is here a likeness yet a major difference
between humility and distrust. The humble man does not want to tempt God by
taking on a task for which he is not yet prepared. But his distrust of self
will give way to an even greater trust in God. But the man who does not trust
God blocks out God's voice because he trusts his own judgment more than the
Holy Spirit. How does one know the
difference between the two? Ask these questions sincerely and honestly. “Am I
hesitant because there is some concrete prerequisite that I would need before I
could fulfill this task or this vocation? Or rather am I hesitant because I am
afraid I will have to sacrifice too much personally for the Lord for this?” The
responsibilities of any vocation can cost much in human terms. But here is
where the last characteristic of the master of the parable should grab hold of
our minds and change our ultimate perspective. As we saw even in Matthew 25,
this is a master who gives responsibilities as rewards, and he considers his
own happiness as the greatest of rewards! It might seem that he is the most
conceited and self-serving person ever. Is his reward only to task the servant
with even more to do? Such a question is asked by modern men who do not believe
in the goodness of God. The desire of a secularized society is always to enjoy
as many benefits as possible without added responsibilities: the enjoyment of
sex without the lifetime commitment of children; the luxury of a good salary
without the demands of working overtime; the benefits of retirement without the
responsibilities to earn one's living each day. Our Lord sees things
differently. All of these commitments may cost us some enjoyment humanly
speaking. All of these commitments will, in turn, give us even greater joy in
the Holy Spirit, with the assurance of an eternal reward. What master can pay his
servants with his own happiness? How could a human being say “come share in
your master's joy”? He is no ordinary master. He is God. Do you have the faith
that our Lord sought when gave the parables, a faith which believes that the
joy of the Lord is worth every earthly sacrifice that his calling asks of us?
If so then you have been given something positive and precious, something no
amount of work could earn or money could buy. You already have the valuable
gold or silver coin in your hand, and when you start to serve the Master with
it, it will be impossible for you to fail. Look for examples of men who have
found their joy by accepting the responsibilities of their vocation. Consider
the great satisfaction of choosing the path which may be risky in human terms,
but which will lead to divine blessings that are incomparably greater than any
benefit measured in human terms.
Humble service and faithful
stewardship
The
Lord has given us something so great as a share in his joy through eternal
life, a gift more precious than any talent. We are to serve the Lord then, and
those He has placed in our lives. This is how we make a return for the valuable
gift of faith and salvation. The service is precisely to “love God and
neighbor.” The key is to have the attitude that our service is not a great
accomplishment (humility), but that we do it out of great love. In the Gospel
of Luke Jesus gave a parable about humble servants.
Luke
17:5-10. And the apostles said to the Lord
“Increase our faith.” The Lord replied, “If you have faith the size of a
mustard seed, you would say to this mulberry tree, Be uprooted and planted in
the sea, and it would obey you. Who among you would say to your servant who has
just come in from plowing or tending sheep in the field, 'Come here immediately
and take your place at table?' Would he not rather say to him, 'Prepare
something for me to eat. Put on your apron and wait on me while I eat and
drink. You may eat and drink when I am finished?' Is he grateful to that
servant because he did what was commanded? So should it be with you. When you
have done all you have been commanded, say, 'We are unprofitable servants; we
have done what we were obliged to do.'”
Let
us remember that even the Master we serve is a humble master; a master who
cares for his servants. We can love him as we serve him, because he himself is
like the centurion who cared for his servant.
Luke
7:2-10. A centurion there had a slave who was
ill and about to die, and he was precious to him. When he heard about Jesus, he
sent elders of the Jews to him, asking him to come and save the life of his
slave. They approached Jesus and strongly urged him to come, saying, “He
deserves to have you do this for him, for he loves our nation and he built the
synagogue for us.” And Jesus went with them, but when he was only a short
distance from the house, the centurion sent friends to tell him, “Lord do not
trouble yourself, for I am not worthy to have you enter under my roof.
Therefore, I did not consider myself worthy to come to you; but say the word
and let my servant be healed. For I too am a person subject to authority, with
soldiers subject to me. And I say to one, 'Go,' and he goes, and to another,
'Come here,' and he comes; and to my slave, 'Do this' and he does it.” When
Jesus heard this he was amazed at him and turning, said to the crowd following
him, “I tell you, not even in Israel have I found such faith.” When the
messengers returned to the house, they found the slave in good health.
The centurion was a humble man who
served God and neighbor in a great way. His words were so honest and virtuous
in this incident that the Church adopted them as a prayer at the most sacred
moment of preparing for Holy Communion at Mass. What an honor given to him for
his humble service. God must be greatly glorifying this centurion in heaven
even now.
Before
we move on to one other parable which will guide our love God and neighbor, let
us dwell on the words of the centurion and on the gift of Holy Communion for a
moment. This greatest of gifts, Holy Communion, is the summation of the immense
grace offered by Christ. It is really the thing which, at one and the same
time, imposes that debt of gratitude upon us, and also gives us the means to
pay that debt. Receiving Holy Communion with the words of the centurion is the
ultimate tribute to the humble service of Jesus Christ. You know one way that
men acknowledge their humble Master in this great gift? The humble reception of
Holy Communion. Consider the image of receiving communion on your knees. This is
not literally advised except where there is an altar rail or kneelers set out
in the church for communicants. Yet the image represents a great spiritual
disposition. I was giving communion once at a youth retreat. Many people
received our Lord on the tongue. Those who received in the hand also received
very reverently. One of my parishioners, there present, would receive last each
day, and kneel. This retreat he was not the only to do so. The experience spoke
to me; young men; receiving on their knees; not just one or two; five of them;
in a row. It made me wonder if men should receive communion on their knees more
often. It should at least make us pray the centurion's words more sincerely, “I
am not worthy that you should enter under my roof, but only say the word and my
soul shall be healed.” Recall that Jesus gave the parable of the humble
servants after he had been asked to increase the faith of the disciples. Go
back and see that he joined this parable with the saying of the mustard seed, a
symbol of smallness, meekness, and humility. Receiving the Lord on one's knees
does not make one a humble man in itself, even if one did it each Sunday at
Mass. But the disposition represented by this idea is an essential. The humble
man will, figuratively speaking, go to his knees before the Lord each day in
the way he lives and prays.
The
centurion's example of humility is essential to love God and neighbor. Jesus
revealed other essential qualities of this love with parables about
stewardship. Here is a parable he told about the need have honesty and generosity
amidst one's responsibilities.
Luke
16:1-8. A rich man had a
steward who was reported to him for squandering his property. He summoned him
and said, “What is this I hear about you? Prepare a full account of your
stewardship, because you can no longer be my steward.” The steward said to
himself “What shall I do, now that my master is taking the position of steward
away from me? I am not strong enough to dig and I am ashamed to beg. I know
what I shall do so that, when I am removed from the stewardship, they may
welcome me into their homes.” He called in his master’s debtors one by one. To
the first he said, “How much do you owe my master?” He replied. “One hundred
measures of olive oil.” He said to him, “Here is your promissory note. Sit down
and quickly write one for fifty.” Then to another he said, “And you, how much
do you owe?” He replied. “One hundred measures of wheat.” He said to him, “Here
is your promissory note. Write one for eighty.” And the master commended that
dishonest steward for acting prudently.
A steward held a powerful position in a
household or kingdom. He was the business manager. He had authority to buy and
sell the master's property even. It could be lucrative, because he could keep
up to 50% of the profits from his dealings with the master's goods. The
conversion of the dishonest steward, who had previously stolen the master’s 50%
of the profits for himself and maybe even spent down capital in selfish
pursuits, came at the moment when finally he was generous. He finally cut a
discount, and forfeited the greedy profit that would have been his if he kept
his stewardship, the 50%. In human terms he learned that making honest friends,
by being a generous upright man, was worth much more than a dishonest fortune.
He relinquished some of his power and greed. He found that his benefit was
found in benefiting another man. His benefit was found in being humble.
What is a steward? A steward is
someone who is given responsibility for something that he does not own. That is
why St. Paul says the first quality, that a steward must have, is honesty (1
Cor. 4:2). He must be trusted with the valuable thing that is entrusted to him
by the owner. Jesus told the parable of the dishonest steward to show that
there are things more valuable than money in this life. God wishes to entrust
things to us as stewards which are more valuable than any sum of money. How has God placed men as stewards?
In the example of marriage and family life, even if a husband and wife are left
without the ability to have biological children, still, because of their
lifelong commitment in marriage, they have become spiritual stewards of the
family, as a God-given institution. Therefore the family has been entrusted to
a husband or a father in a special way, as something that he does not own. In
the example of the priesthood, St. Paul described the role of a priest
explicitly as a stewardship: priests are to be “servants of Christ and stewards
of the mysteries of God” (1 Cor. 4:1). Clearly the “Mysteries of God” are not
owned by a priest; he is only their steward. We will come back to both of these
descriptions soon. Let us say for now that God has given “fatherhood” as a
special vocation of stewardship: either spiritual fatherhood or literal
fatherhood. The thing of value that the man does not own but for which he bears
responsibility is either the family or the Church.
Before
we consider further the vocations of stewardship that men hold, a word about
the relation of men and women in scripture is appropriate. St. Peter says in 1
Peter 3:7 that women are “the weaker sex.” Scripture here should be taken with
some saintly common sense. It is misconstruing to say this should be understood
in an emotional or psychological way. It is certainly offering a physical
description. On average, men will overpower women in terms of mere stature:
size, or physical strength. The exceptions, such as the occasional female
athlete outdoing her male counterpart, almost “prove the rule” as the saying
goes. So what if women are generally weaker than men in the sense of physical
strength? In the ancient world of agriculture the ability to prosper was
dependent on the strength to perform manual labor. The more that humanity has
responded to its God-given vocation – to multiply and fill the earth and subdue
it – the more society has the potential to be transcend from this “inequality.”
We should note that the blessing of modern education, which has allowed so many
women to advance in technological skills, is rooted in Christianity's patrimony
to universities and schools. With this technological progress, however, come
new forms of exploitation: from pornography and human trafficking, to general
societal abandonment of family values. How then should the remaining “inequalities”
in society be considered according to the Gospel? If men have power to shape
any particular situation, to influence others, they must recognize that the
only authority allotted to them by Christ is that of a steward. They must
recognize that any power a person possesses, whether it be physical, social,
financial, etc. does not mean any superiority in dignity. This is the case for
every man or women on the face of this earth. Chivalry is the virtue of
honoring what is physically weaker and smaller – out of imitation of God
himself! It is the homage paid to the
humility of God, who “chooses the weak to shame the strong” (1 Cor. 1:27).
There is, then, a Godly way that the strong should serve the weak, because God
himself will punish every steward who abuses what God has allowed to fall under
his persuasion. St. Peter is getting at this when he says “husbands should live
with their wives in understanding, showing honor to the weaker female sex,
since we are joint heirs of the gift of life, so that your prayers may not be
hindered” (1 Peter 3:7). In his day it was necessary to express this in such a
way. In our day, the core principal of his exhortation is repeated by insisting
that all people are to serve God and neighbor with the strengths they have been
given.
The
unredeemed world has never figured out the riddle that Jesus presented. The riddle is the question, how can one
exercise power by giving up? How can one lead by serving? How can a steward not
be corrupted? How can one be a king and servant? How can authority be affirmed,
and power not be abused? “How is it that the Son of Man must suffer and die?”
When we hear Jesus' words about power, in any sense of the word, the Christian
acknowledges Christ as the one to whom all things are subjected (1 Cor. 15:27).
He is the Lord to whom all power and dominion are given (Rev. 5:13). All
earthly power therefore is temporary and accountable to Christ. Our secular
society equates power with privilege. In the true scheme of things, seen in the
Biblical light of Christ, power is equated with responsibility to God, very
often, responsibility for other people; that is, responsibility to other
people, for God's sake. Men must realize the only authority they are given in
this life is that of a steward. God owns
the Church. God owns the family. God has even purchased the lives of each
married spouse through the blood of his Son. (1 Cor. 6:20). Whatever kind of
strength (or strengths) he has given to men in these societies, He has
commanded them to use it so as to serve Him as trustworthy stewards of the
things He values so much.
Family and Church
A
word then on how this might be applied to the two fatherly vocations of men:
family and church. In the case of the family, husbands could be described as
stewards as described above. A husband's wife and family are a gift from God. Marriage and
family come from God and ultimately belong to God. It is not merely one's own
family for which a husband and father is responsible. It is really God's own
family. In the tradition of the Church, the family has literally been claimed
by God. Fathers must have a reverent stewardship for their families. This is
the perspective that is needed whenever a man thinks of the scriptures where it
somehow implies that a wife and children owe “obedience” to a father. This is
not personal, and it does not mean that a husband owns any rights over his wife
or family. It means precisely that he is responsible to God for them. He must
be “a servant of Christ and steward of the family.” What this looks like in practice is
different in each family situation. Where a husband does not have a biological
family, his stewardship will naturally extend in a spiritual way to others,
very much like the spiritual fatherhood of a priest. The difference is that it
might not extend through a parish or a church community, but rather through a
social sphere carved out by his relationship with his wife, wherever they live.
So
many people have gotten tripped up asking the “should” question. What “should”
the authorities of a husband or a wife be? What “should” the responsibilities
of each be? It would be better to ask, “what 'can' be done by each?” And then,
more importantly, what can be done with the abilities that God has entrusted to
each spouse? When it comes to marital responsibilities, a helpful exhortation
these days is that they are not shared 50/50, but 100/100, each giving their
all. Above all it should be 100% responsible to Christ; because, even though each man's family
situation is different, every family has been purchased by Christ, by the grace
of the mystery of redemption.
Consider all of this in the following
paraphrase of Ephesians 5:21-33.
Every person, married or unmarried has been given their own gifts
and responsibilities, and each must fulfill their own responsibilities without
usurping those of others, as a way of serving Christ, the loving savior. Yes,
wives and mothers put their gifts at the service of their husband and family.
Yes, the Lord has given a husband and father responsibilities which cannot be
fulfilled by his wife. Remember then that Christ disavowed himself of every
possession for the good of his family the Church, which is to say, for the
salvation of its members. As gratefully, therefore, as the Church receives the
gifts and graces of the Lord Jesus, a husband and father should be encouraged
in his stewardship for his family, which he fulfills with whatever abilities
God has given him. Husbands and fathers must do everything that they can for
their wife and family out of Christlike love, putting their gifts to whatever
task Christ calls them. Christ gave them an example of sacrifice when he
“handed himself over for the Church, to sanctify her, cleansing her by the bath
of water with the word.” He paid for the holiness of the Church that he might
make her his bride, united so closely that they are as one body. So a husband
is one flesh with his wife, and loving her is the only Christlike way that he
can fulfill himself in the service of Christ. If he loves her he will love his
family. Both husbands and wives fulfill their responsibilities for their family
with the gifts God has given them, as a stewardship, the wife understanding and encouraging
his family responsibilities, the husband loving his wife and family, as
himself.
Because, the family has been purchased
by Christ, by the grace of the mystery of redemption.
In
the case of the Church, a priest is a spiritual father-figure for his people, entrusted with a
stewardship. What is the valuable thing that is entrusted to a priest all
the while belonging to God? The mysteries of salvation; that is, the message of
the Gospel, since the priest is responsible for its proclamation; and the
sacraments of the Church, since they are literally described as “mysteries” in
the Church's Tradition. A priest must be trustworthy because he has the
temptation to misuse the greatness of God's property that has been put into his
hands. He could squander it like the dishonest steward, using his spiritual
power and status in a parish for his own benefit and enjoyment. He could
literally seek after financial wealth, trading the holiest of things for paltry
earthly goods. Or he could pretend that the parish and people belong to him
personally, as if God placed them there so that the priest's own desires and
expectations would always be fulfilled.
A priest must love the Church like a
husband loves his wife and family. Many people outside the Church see the
all-male Catholic priesthood as a prejudiced system of male dominance over
women. Perhaps they do not know what our Lord said about authority and
stewardship. Or perhaps they are pointing out that some priests have forgotten
what our Lord said about authority and stewardship. If every priest were a
living saint, no one would question whether Christ had left us a broken,
faulty, or prejudiced system of priesthood. Yet, despite the unsaintliness of
some clergy (the author of these reflections included) if one sees things with
the eyes of faith, the priesthood should be acknowledged as one of the best
institutions on earth.
The sacrament of Holy Orders places a
man within the ranks of a hierarchy. It makes him like the centurion, who
described himself as “subject to authority, with people subject to me.” But the
scriptures vehemently insist that the greatest factor in salvation is not
authority, but charity. Glory comes not from hierarchy, but from virtue. This
should be evident within the ranks of Holy Orders. And this principle of grace
is not confined to the clergy; it runs throughout the entire Body of Christ, to
all the elect, and is even proved through the souls who have forever turned
their back on God. Just like earthly pleasures and earthly possessions, all
earthly authority is temporary; glory is eternal. For myself, I can say I know
a good number of lay men and lay women, who, while I outrank them in hierarchy,
as a priest, will soon enough (or already) outrank me in
glory, when we are with the Lord. God will not be mocked, and one can never
accuse him of injustice from seeming to play favorites. He has revealed to all
people (who have the faith to accept it) the scales on which he will judge the
merits of souls, and those scales read “faith, hope, and charity.” A priest is
a steward with fatherly responsibilities for the Church and the people of God. But
even here authority is accountable to charity. Yes, there is the scandal of men
who neglect grace, and who lack faith, hope and love. There is also the example
of many men who have put on the virtues of Christ. Above all there is the
example of our Lord himself, the fulfillment of every priest, the fulfillment
of every family, and father, and husband.
Conclusion
I
hope this has provided the slightest inspiration to see the message that
Scripture presents for a Catholic man, and every man who wishes to serve God by
living rightly. There are many more parables that could speak directly to men.
I have not even touched on some of my favorites. But I encourage the reader to
meditate upon them at some other time. Go read about the men Jesus described in
the Gospels. You will find how the words of the prophet Nathan, in strange and
grace filled ways, have turned from condemnation to salvation. Are you a man
who has received Christ as your savior? Read Matthew 20:1-16. The guy who
showed up for one hour of work and was paid as if he had been on the job for
the whole day? You are that man. Go back and read Matthew 18:23-35. The guy who
owed millions of dollars and was forgiven the whole debt? You are that man.
Read Matt 22:11-14. The man who was invited to a tremendous royal wedding feast
and only given the smallest responsibility to borrow a garment for the
occasion? You are that man. Read Luke 10:25-37. The man who owed his life to a
foreigner whom he previously had despised? You are that man. In the Old
Testament the accusation “you are that man” stood as an indictment of guilt,
just as it was used to convict David of his sins. In the New Testament, for the
man of the Church, who has come to know the Savior Jesus Christ, the situation
of that man has changed drastically. Now he is the man of the promise. His only
debt is to love. He is the beneficiary of grace. He is a son of God, whose life
has been changed by Christ, the Son of God.
